Calling It As I See It (III)

Have you ever noticed that there are a ton of birthdays from roughly the dates of November 10 to November 25? I sure have. I was born on November 16 and I have two other people in my family alone that were born on that day. (An aunt and an uncle, no my immediate family, but family nonetheless). How can this be? So many people are born around this time of year. A little while ago I came up with my own theory on why this is true.

The theory is simply two words: Valentine's Day. That's right. The great Hallmark Holiday is responsible for something, and it is a ton of birthdays in from November 10 to 25. How? Well, if you count nine months backward (you know, the time it takes a child to develop inside a mother) from November 14 what do you land on? Boom. February 14! Oh my. I bet that there are a lot of married couples, and a lot of couples in general doing the deed on that date. And we all know the nine month rule isn't an exact science, you have to give and take a few days here or there, hence the 10th to the 25th. I have noticed that more kids are born that week after November 14 than before, this is probably because the Valentine's Day festivities could carry over for a little while. Either way, that is the reason for it.

In reality the nine month rule is a fun one, and kind of a gross one. Every person can find out when they were conceived, and assume what the circumstances most likely were. I'm a Valentine's Day baby. November 16 is when I was born. The real question is....what are you?

Just Another Grade School Ripoff

So yesterday was my birthday and I start reflecting on some birthdays that have passed. I remember playing football with some friends in my backyard for a few (probably like all of them from ages 6-10). I remember going to see the Mighty Ducks for one (perhaps before coming back and playing a football game). I remember having a big ol' surprise sweet 16 party at my house when my leg was broken sophomore year. And then I start thinking about grade school. And as with most things grade school related, my adult mind sees a large problem.

Correct me if I'm wrong, but when it was your birthday in grade school you had to provide some sort of treats. I remember always bringing in brownies or cookies or maybe even a cake on the day of my birthday. Usually it was something that I had to work on with my mom the night before. Now I realize that this makes absolutely no sense. It's my damn birthday, why do I have to bring in treats for everybody else? Shouldn't everybody in the class have to buy/make/steal me a cookie, brownie or piece of cake? And then I sit there with 24 cookies and eat as many as my little stomach can handle? Shouldn't that be the way it works? Instead I have to bring in brownies for everybody else. What a joke. I should get to eat them all, it's MY birthday, after all.

Adding to that, what about those goodie bags that were given out at grade school birthday parties. Those are ridiculous too. Again, it is my birthday, why do you get a present? If you want a present from me, invite me to your birthday and I'll buy you some crappy t-shirt or something. That is the way it should work. If I go to a party now, I don't get a goodie bag on the way out. When is the cutoff for this? I think it is when you move on to the 7th grade, and I don't know why. I remember going with my mom to pick out contents of the goodie bags a few times. That was torture. It was my nearing my birthday and I had to pick out things to give away? Crazy talk.

They Might As Well Be House Pets

So I am strolling through campus today, and I notice something that has become more and more prevalent in my mind: Campus squirrels are borderline tame animals. They are halfway between the wild and humane. I was walking down the sidewalk this morning and one was practically walking down the sidewalk with me. Just strolling along as if we were old friends. Then, after my class, I was walking to the bus to get to my car and one meandered out in front of me about two steps quicker than a snail would. It was like I wasn't even there.

Is this a trend? Have squirrels on college campuses become part of a different environment? I know if I so much as open my back door at home the squirrels go running in all different directions. I seriously think I can pet these squirrels. The old myth was that animals were cool with humans for about a day or two and then we began to hunt and eat them and now they are affraid of us. Well, I don't think there are any college kids hunting squirrels, so if that myth is true, it has dissapeared in the squirrel population over the years at Mizzou.

I think if I applied myself to a little over half of my capabilities I could capture one of these squirrels and make him my house pet. I'd call him Samurai, because that would be a badass squirrel.

Keeping It Fun

I play fantasy sports. But even for someone who loves to play, it can get boring. I have taken the past two years off of fantasy football because it is dull. I did not do fantasy basketball last year because I have lost some interest in the NBA (i'm back this year and my interest in the NBA is growing again). I will never quit fantasy baseball because I love it so much.

But I now have a new favorite fantasy game. Fantasy hockey. Why? Because I don't understand hockey in the least bit, but I enjoy the game. I love to follow it, but I have no idea (after about the top 30 guys) as to who is good and who is bad. The drafts I did were a blast because after six rounds, I had no idea who I was drafting. It is so much more fun when you only have a vauge idea of what you are doing. If I lose, I don't care. Where in baseball if I lose I get frustrated.

What makes it so fun? Fanasy sports are about stats, and I don't understand many hockey stats outside of goals, assists and penalty minutes. One of the fantasy stats is plus/minus rating. What is that? No idea. I know it is the differential of goals scored while a player is on the ice vs. goals allowed when a player is on the ice (Ex: A player's team scores two goals and gives up three while he is out there skating, then he is minus one for the night). But how do I determine if a player is "good" at plus/minus? I don't know. Good team? Maybe, but it seems more of a random thing. A team could just have a really bad group of guys who give up a lot of goals, while another group do well on the ice. I don't know. It is strange. But a ton of fun.

Another stat I don't get is goals allowed average. This one if for goalies and seems simple enough. But I think it is divided by minutes played because I have seen a lot of goofy numbers in the GAA column of my netminders. They give up three goals in a night, but their GAA is like 3.59 or something. It's just wacky.

All in all it is just a fun thing for me. If you are a fantasy sports player and become tired with the games you play, maybe give one of the other ones a shot. I might try fantasy golf next year. Because I doubt I will understand that at all.